GRR 109

Perhaps due to the weather, the gomtang restaurant was crowded with people. He wondered if he would have to stand in line in this cold, but thanks to grandfather having made a reservation in advance, they were able to go straight in and be shown to a table. Jion took off his bag and padded jacket and placed them on the chair next to him, then quickly set up the cutlery and water cups for his grandfather and himself. In the meantime, grandfather ordered two bowls of gomtang and some boiled beef slices.

Jion watched his grandfather drink water while wiping his hands with a wet tissue. He felt sorry for having neglected him while helping the grim reapers. When their eyes met, Jion smiled awkwardly. His grandfather, wiping his hands as well, opened his mouth.

“You said you have to pay to the school.”

“Ah, I paid during the day.”

“Where did the money come from?”

“I had some saved as a deposit, so I used that.”

When Jion smiled brightly, hoping for praise, grandfather, who had been expressionless all along, finally let out a chuckle. Although there were no words of praise Jion had hoped for, grandfather pushed the plate in front of Jion when the gomtang was served.

“Eat quickly.”

“Yes. Grandpa, you have some too.”

“Alright.”

Jion only started eating after seeing his grandfather put a piece of meat in his mouth first. He didn’t really have an appetite, but he had no choice but to eat diligently because he knew his grandfather would worry if he showed it.

However, there was nothing he could do about his thoughts. Jion recalled his mother, who had diligently fed him here long ago, and ruminated on the words his mother had told him before leaving this world.

What happened to mom, whom Kwon Chasa took away, ever since? Has she already been reincarnated, or is she still being punished? Even though there was someone who could answer those questions he had always wondered about, he felt as though he wouldn’t be able to say a word if he actually stood before him. He wouldn’t be able to open his mouth due to the complex tangle of emotions.

Jion also knew that Kwon Chasa was not at fault. Kwon Chasa had simply done the task assigned to him. After years of trial and error doing that work, he had simply guided the deceased to the underworld in the optimal way that suited him.

There must have been some who had already become vengeful spirits, and many who were too much attached to the living world that kind persuasion and appeasement had absolutely no effect on them. At first, he couldn’t understand him for being so harsh toward the deceased, but now he knew that he couldn’t conclude that his methods were wrong.

He knew it all. He understood it all in his head, but his heart felt different. If only he had spoken to his mother a little more kindly, he wouldn’t have cried so bitterly. If that had happened, Mom could have gone to the underworld with a little stolen content more peace of mind. Thoughts of regret over the past kept swirling in his head.

Was he always this kind of person who complicated his thoughts? He thought he was living a positive life, but now everything seemed to have gone wrong.

“…Grandpa.”

“Yes?”

Jion looked down at the steaming gomtang placed before him and spoke.

“Mom… I wonder if she has been reincarnated by now?”

As soon as the words left his mouth, grandfather’s hand stopped abruptly. But Jion added.

“It’s been over 10 years… I wonder if she’s still being punished.”

Jion smiled softly as he looked at his grandfather, who had finally picked up a spoon, and stirred the gomtang. The white rice grains and thin slices of meat moved back and forth, much like a restless mind.

Jion looked at his grandfather, who remained silent. Not long after, his grandfather slowly took a sip of water and spoke.

“We can only hope she’s living well. That’s all you and I can do.”

“…….”

“Jion, aren’t you ignoring a word I say and going around meeting ghosts just because you want your mother to be doing well?”

Jion bit his lip, struck where it hurt. He had nothing to say, having been beaten all over his body with a wild peach tree branch not long ago. As Jion forced a smile to try and smooth things over, his grandfather nodded to say, “Go ahead and eat.”

Only then did Jion scoop up a spoonful of rice and meat together and blow on it to cool it down. He put it in his mouth and chewed, but it didn’t taste as good as usual. It was because he was reminded of Kwon Chasa, who had looked devastated upon hearing his story, as if the world had collapsed around him. It was the first time he had glimpsed such emotion in Kwon Chasa, who was always so calm.

As he bit his lip and lowered his head, feeling as if tears were about to well up again, his grandfather’s low voice fell from above.

“That’s enough.”

He didn’t know why his heart dropped at those words. It must mean that he no longer needed to harbor guilt over what happened to his mother, and that he could stop getting entangled with ghosts now…

But why did it sound like he had to give up on his feelings for Kwon Chasa too?

Jion took a spoonful of rice and shoved it into his wide-open mouth. He couldn’t cry in front of his grandfather, so he tried to focus solely on chewing. However, the tip of his nose kept stinging, and his throat felt constricted.

Jion could no longer shake off the image of Kwon Chasa, who kept flickering before his eyes and filling his mind. With his head bowed, forcing himself to eat, Jion ruminated on the memories from the time he first met Kwon Chasa until now.

Kwon Chasa, who nagged him about everything, yet Kwon Chasa, who wrapped his warm hand around his every time they crossed a gate, Kwon Chasa, who he didn’t realize at first because of his indifferent expression but turned out to be affectionate, Kwon Chasa, who said he didn’t want to be reincarnated, Kwon Chasa, who saved him, Kwon Chasa, who finally told him he loved him… …

There was not a single moment that was not precious, nor was there a moment he wanted to erase from his memory. Even the moments when he failed to understand him, felt hurt, or was upset were all good. He knew that even if he were never to meet Kwon Chasa again, those memories and his current feelings would not easily fade or be forgotten.

Jion recalled the thoughts he had the moment he decided to help with this matter. He knew that the grim reaper who had taken his mother was Kwon Chasa, but that didn’t make him hate him or cause his feelings for him to cool. He still liked him, and because he liked him, he felt hurt, and because he liked him, he wanted him to be happy. He didn’t want to see him suffer. He didn’t want him to look at him with eyes filled with despair.

Jion took a deep breath and adjusted his grip on the spoon. He thought that if he kept his promise to the woman and she left the [visit our site]mortal world, Kwon Chasa would also settle all his affairs here and leave. But if that was what Kwon Chasa truly wanted, it was right to help her.

Just like Kwon Chasa, who looked at him crying with despair, he also didn’t want to see Kwon Chasa suffering.

“You might choke. Eat slowly.”

“Yes.”

Jion smiled at his grandfather who pushed a cup filled with water in front of him. He resolved to gather his strength to eat, and to seriously consider a way for the woman to let go of her attachments and leave this world.

***

Although it was Saturday and sleeping in was permitted, Jion opened Dakyung’s door early in the morning and sat down in a corner. Since his grandfather was sleeping soundly after having even had some medicinal liquor yesterday, he left the house after leaving a note saying he would open the shop instead of waking him up.

Since it wasn’t official opening time yet, Jion was the only one inside Dakyung. He placed his chin on his hand, gazed out the window, and let out a sigh.

How could that ghost leave this place [stolen content]with even a little peace of mind? The answer to this question did not come.

He didn’t know the exact circumstances, but since the child was in an orphanage, there were no family or relatives to look after him or her. Perhaps that was why she felt even more uneasy.

“ha….”

He should have listened a little more to the story. Since he didn’t know much, his thoughts couldn’t extend any further. He couldn’t make a promise he couldn’t keep to reassure her, nor could he simply smooth over the immediate situation with lies, so his worries only grew worse.

Jion sighed before picking up his phone and searching for the name of the orphanage where the child was. Fortunately, there was a website, so he went in, and the first thing that caught his eye was a photo of the orphanage’s exterior.

A few more photos were visible below. Most of them were taken from a distance or showed the children’s backs, so their faces were not visible, and even the few frontal photos had heart, star, or sunglasses stickers stuck to their faces. However, he could tell the children were happy from their uncovered smiles and their chubby cheeks. Seeing their bright smiles, Jion naturally smiled as well.

As he scrolled all the way down the screen, he saw the address of the orphanage written at the very bottom. He searched for it on a map app and found it was in a much more remote location than he had expected. He wondered seriously if he should visit at least once, and as he absentmindedly returned to the top of the page…

“…Ah.”

…Jion gasped as he read the text. This was because he had discovered menus for [visit our site]‘Volunteering’ and ‘Sponsorship Application’ there.

Jion clicked the volunteer tab with a determined look. On the changed screen, detailed information was written below the text reading “Volunteer Eligibility Requirements.” The conditions stipulated that one must be twenty years old or older, in good health, and able to volunteer at least once a week for a minimum of one year. He felt he could give it a try if it were close to home, but since the distance was far, he wasn’t confident he could do it consistently.