MTM 148

It was just as the two of them had stepped onto the bridge. Harto stole a quick glance at Zed’s profile. Zed, who hadn’t even touched the wine Ser had made, looked exactly as he always did, but Harto, feeling tipsy from a few glasses of low-proof wine, felt his inhibitions melt away and found a little courage.

“Zed, do you mind if we walk along the lakeshore for a bit? The moon is so beautiful…”

In response to Harto’s tentative suggestion, Zed stopped and turned to face him.

“Sure.”

With his back to the moonlight, Zed nodded with his usual gentle smile. The sight was so beautiful that Harto’s heart fluttered.

‘I guess Zed wanted to be alone with me too….’

He couldn’t hold back the shy smile that appeared on his face. Thanks to Leon pretending to be drunk and stepping aside, he’d gained this precious moment, and this time, he wanted to have a proper conversation with Zed.

‘It’s fine just like this….’

He also wanted to simply enjoy this time walking in silence. It felt a bit awkward to call them lovers, but since they’d confirmed their feelings for each other, he wanted to fully enjoy this feeling.

So Harto mustered his courage and gently took Zed’s hand as they walked side by side. As he lifted his head, feeling the warm heat radiating through his palm, he found that Zed had stopped walking and was staring at him.

No, to be precise, he wasn’t staring at Harto, but Harto’s wrist, the one that had just taken his hand.

“Zed…?”

Harto lowered his head to look downward. Through the fragments of the spirit stone and jewels set in his bracelet, a bluish bruise on his wrist, was clearly visible.

“Uh, this is….”

Harto’s heart dropped. He recalled the moment earlier in the square when Gerard had been holding onto his cloak. This was the mark left behind when Zed had suddenly appeared and grabbed his wrist so hard it felt like it would break.

“This bruise…”

Zed touched Harto’s wrist as he spoke in a low voice. Startled, Harto quickly pulled his hand away.

“Whoa! T-that’s weird. Why is there a bruise? It doesn’t hurt at all! I’m serious. It’s nothing, so don’t worry about it. I’m really fine!”

He blurted it out in a panic, afraid Zed might blame himself, but it seemed to have backfired. Zed’s face froze into an icy expression.

“…Why are you saying you’re fine?”

“Huh? No, that’s not it–I just…”

“I’m the one who did this.”

“Ah, I don’t think so? I must have bumped into something. It doesn’t even hurt!”

Harto said with a forced smile. But Zed’s gaze only grew more menacing.

“…Harto.”

“Uh, uh…?”

Feeling something was wrong in the voice calling his name, Harto glanced at Zed.

“You idiot, I did this. I went crazy watching that bastard lay a hand on you, so I did this.”

His voice was rough, his shadow, cast by the moonlight behind him, stretched out and covered Harto’s face. When Zed’s face, which had always been gentle, was swallowed by the darkness and became invisible, Harto momentarily felt that the man before him was a stranger, even frightening.

“Z-Zed….”

Harto tried to calm his heart, which was beating so fast it felt like it would explode, and cautiously reached out toward Zed. But his hand froze in place at the cold voice that followed.

“Harto, why are you always so vulnerable?”

As Zed took a step closer, Harto took a step back. Yet Zed closed the distance even further, he walked forward to block Harto’s view. Moonlight shone brightly in his golden eyes as he tilted his face slightly.

“Do you know how that bastard looked at you? Even after seeing those eyes, how could you…!”

“……!”

As his voice grew louder, Harto held his breath and hunched his shoulders. His frightened heart pounded relentlessly. Zed had never once raised his voice before. Though he was so scared he wanted to run away, Harto couldn’t tear his eyes away from Zed’s contorted face.

‘Zed, why…? Why that expression….’

Contrary to his scolding words, Zed’s face was contorted as if he were in agony. If he wasn’t mistaken, it wasn’t anger directed at him but more like self-reproach.

“You’re fine? That bastard dared to lay a hand on you, and I hurt you… How could you possibly be fine?”

Harto realized that Zed was replaying the incident with Gerard from earlier that day in the square. He shook his head in panic.

“No, Zed! It really wasn’t like that… Ugh!”

He couldn’t even finish denying it when Zed grabbed Hart’s arm and pulled him away. Before he could resist, he was dragged to the base of a bridge, into the pitch-black thicket where no light penetrated. The moment the scent of damp earth brushed against his nose, Zed roughly pushed Harto against the stone wall and pressed his lips against his.

“Mmm, uh…!”

A torrent of kisses, filled with scorching heat, rained down. The more Harto squirmed and tried to break free, the more Zed’s lips clung to him. His hands pressed down on Harto’s arms. It felt so heavy and painful that he felt like he was about to burst into tears. Above all, his heart ached.

He didn’t want Zed to misunderstand him; he just wanted to talk…

Feeling hurt and wronged, Harto struggled even more fiercely in Zed’s embrace, but then he froze. Zed’s hands, which held him so tightly he couldn’t move an inch, were trembling ever so slightly.

‘Ah…’

Eventually, Harto gave up resisting and went limp. As his movements subsided, Zed pulled him closer to him with even greater force and took a deep breath. It was a compulsive and desperate act, visit our site as if he were trying to trap every trace of Harto’s scent inside himself.

His rough, anger-filled breathing gradually subsided, but Zed still wouldn’t let go of Harto.

“I… I feel so suffocated that I want to crush every hand that touches your body. Why do you act like nothing’s wrong… and keep driving me crazy like this?”

Zed’s hot breath scattered over Harto’s chapped lips. His golden eyes were stained with jealousy and self-reproach. The image of the Zed who had always been so affectionate had long since shattered into pieces.

A sharp ache pierced Harto’s heart. It pained him to see Zed revealing his possessiveness toward him, yet simultaneously wounding himself with that very fact.

“Zed….”

Harto gently traced Zed’s face with his fingertips. Even in the darkness beneath the bridge, the moonlight peeking through softly illuminated his face.

How long had Zed been enduring this agonizing emotion alone, without him even realizing it? Through Zed’s eyes, he sensed a pain that could not be hidden.

‘I wish Zed… would understand my heart. That we feel the same way…. I wish he wouldn’t have to feel this stolen contentpain that’s eating him up anymore….’

Harto truly felt that way. The sorrow and sense of injustice he had felt were already the last thing on his mind. He thought that if it could alleviate the pain of the one he loved even a little, he would gladly give up everything he possessed.

The moment he made up his mind, Harto immediately stood on tiptoe and kissed the tip of his chin. He could feel Zed stiffen.

“You’re right. It’s my fault. I was too careless and ended up hurting your feelings… But, Zed, you’re the only one for me. Ever since I met you in that cave… my mind has always been filled with nothing but you. My heart, my soul… they know nothing but you. I could say it over and over again, even to a complete stranger. That I belong to Zed. That I’m a fool who knows nothing but Zed….”

“…….”

At the simple yet heartfelt confession, Zed’s pupils trembled slightly. His golden eyes gradually brightened as they filled with relief.

“…I’m sorry for scaring you.”

After apologizing to Harto, Zed pulled his hand toward him and pressed it against his cheek. Then, with his eyes closed, he rubbed his face against Harto’s touch. Suddenly, he looked like a child to Harto. A child overwhelmed by anxiety, desperately craving affection… Harto realized that perhaps Zed was walking through an abyss of anxiety far deeper than his own.

“I wasn’t scared. And… because it’s you, I’m fine.”

“…Do you know how dangerous that is?”

“Dangerous?”

“It sounds like you’re saying you’ll accept whatever I do to you.”

At Zed’s whisper, Harto didn’t look away but met his eyes directly.

“That’s exactly what I meant…”

Perhaps dissatisfied that his meaning hadn’t been conveyed properly, Harto pouted. Unable to resist that cute gesture, Zed burst into a soft chuckle. The atmosphere was a complete reversal from the tense moment just a moment ago.

“Seriously, you’re impossible.”

As he smiled brightly, the tense atmosphere melted away like snow.