FDD 13

5. 10 Reasons Why I Can’t Hate You

Luca visited Grey’s often enough to exchange friendly conversations with Carol. And every time, he met Noah there. Sometimes Noah would arrive first and wait for Luca, other times Luca would arrive first and wait for Noah, and there were even times when they parked at the same time.

The two talked a lot and spent time at Grey’s. However, Luca and Noah did not go out of their way to acknowledge each other inside the school. This was due to an unspoken agreement that doing so would add to the mystery of their relationship.

Although he hadn’t made a promise with Noah, he somehow wanted to see him. So, on the day Luca visited Grey’s for the second time, hoping to see Noah again, he had his first conversation with the restaurant owner, Blue Grey. Blue Grey was the plump woman Luca had caught a glimpse of in the kitchen the other day, and she was Carol’s longtime friend and roommate.

Blue Grey’s name wasn’t Blue (her real name was Isabella), but both Carol and Noah called her Blue. Her hair was light brown, and it wasn’t because she particularly liked the color blue. Nor was it due to her personality. She was far from being a gloomy person.

It simply stuck after a few years ago, when Isabella’s knees turned blue after a bad fall, and Carol jokingly called her “Blue,” because her knees were “blue.” Isabella called herself “Blue” because she found it bothersome to pronounce her own name, and from then on, she became Blue Grey.

Grey’s was originally the restaurant of Blue’s father, James Grey. He ran the shop for 30 years, but he became too frail and eventually stepped down. He then began painting to fulfill a childhood dream. However, he wasn’t a good painter, so he soon gave up and started swimming, another childhood dream of his. Of course, he wasn’t a good swimmer either.

Thus, Blue Grey took over Grey’s, and Blue found the name tacky and wanted to change the restaurant’s name. However, the attempt was abandoned due to the dissuasion of the regulars; instead, the old sign was torn down and a new, glittering neon sign was hung up.

Carol thought it looked even more tacky, but since the owner was Blue, she didn’t bother to say anything.

Blue was a better cook than her father, James, and thanks to that, she was able to attract other regulars. However, because the restaurantp’s location was so awkward, it was difficult to attract new customers beyond the acquaintances of the regulars. That was why Luca was a very exceptional customer, and Blue took a liking to him. She liked him so much that on the day of Luca’s second visit, she was already sitting at the bar smiling brightly at him before he had even entered.

She intended it as a welcome, but when he an imposing, unfamiliar woman smiling brightly at him, Luca almost turned around and left the restaurant. However, he couldn’t bring himself to do it and awkwardly went and sat in the seat he had sat in during his previous visit. Then it was Blue, not Carol, who brought the menu and handed it to Luca.

“I can tell just by looking at your face! You’re the new customer who came the other day, right? You really are handsome, just like Carol said. She has high standards, you know. I tell you, she doesn’t usually say a guy is handsome!”

Blue rambled on in a boisterous voice without giving Luca a chance to react, then burst into laughter. Blue’s loud laughter was stopped by Carol, who had appeared out of nowhere.

“It’s not that my standards are high, yours are low. Blue was saying Adam Driver was that handsome the other day. Well, he’s not a bad guy, but he’s not that handsome.”

“He’s tall and that’s handsome enough! Isn’t he the main character of Star Wars because he’s handsome? Not that I want to date him, though. Why date Kylo Ren when Finn and Poe are here? He looks too much like a middle schooler.”

Luca, who had been listening to Carol and Blue’s conversation, pictured Adam Driver’s face. Not long after, he became confused as to whether Blue’s compliment about his face was a compliment or an insult. Just as Luca was becoming more and more confused, Noah suddenly interrupted Carol and Blue’s conversation.

“Hey. The main character of Star Wars is Rey. Hi, Luca. Nice to see you again.”

Noah looked directly at Luca and greeted him with a smile.

“Yeah, Noah, hi.”

Luca returned Noah’s greeting as naturally as possible so as not to seem awkward or strange. And as if they had agreed on it beforehand, Noah went and sat down at the seat across from him. Only then did he greet Blue and Carol.

“Blue, Carol. Hi. I’m here.”

“Right. Noah, what do you want to eat today?”

Carol smiled as she asked Noah. Without even looking at the menu, Noah replied.

“I’ll have a cheeseburger. Leave [visit our site]out the pickles, and please put plenty of onions on top. For the drink, Cherry Coke.”

Carol took an order pad out of her apron and jotted down Noah’s order. Then she looked at Luca. The latter hurriedly opened the menu. However, since he hadn’t tried anything other than the milkshake, and wasn’t particularly hungry, and with no specific order in mind, he stared at the menu for a long time.

But as the gazes of Noah, Carol, and Blue all turned toward him, he felt overwhelmed and flustered, so he hid his face behind the menu and answered in a low voice.

“I want the same thing as Noah…”

Carol and Blue returned to the kitchen after taking their orders. Normally, they would take the menu away, but since Luca was holding it so tightly, they simply left it for him to keep.

Because he had blocked his view with the menu, Luca only realized too late that Noah’s face was right nearby. Noah leaned forward, stretched his upper body across the table, and rested his chin on the menu while looking at Luca.

“Luca, what are you doing? Is there something interesting there?”

Luca was very surprised by Noah, who had come within a stone’s throw of him, but he pretended nothing was wrong and mumbled.

“No. I haven’t been here many times, so I was just wondering what was on the menu…”

“I’ll order something different every time, so try the dish I order each time. Everything here tastes good.”

Noah gently snatched the menu from Luca’s hand. Because of this, Luca had nothing to cover his face with, leaving him with no choice but to expose his face completely to Noah.

Luca wasn’t the type to be particularly shy or reserved around others, but he found himself acting like a fool in front of Noah. It was the first time in his life that this had happened.

He decided to assume for now that it was probably because Noah was such a handsome and cool person that [unauthorized copy]being alone with him felt awkward.

“I think I used my head too much today. I’m hungry.”

Noah said with an exaggerated sigh. Although he was more developed than his peers, when he lowered the corners of his eyes, they sparkled like a child’s.

“Looks like you studied a lot?”

“I said I did my best, but do you think I could compare to you, Luca? The whole school is full of rumors about how smart you are.”

“Me? I guess they just think of me that way because I’m Asian.”

Luca was actually good at studying and clever, and he was well aware of this fact himself. However, he feigned humility. This was because he had been taught by his parents that this was the proper attitude for a Korean to adopt.

Furthermore, in American high schools, academics were not the top priority. Luca thought that Noah, who had joined the football team and displayed exceptional talent, was more impressive than himself, who was good at studying.

The two exchanged various conversations regarding school life. Luca had chosen French as his second foreign language, while Noah had chosen Spanish. Luca called it unfair, but Noah felt wronged. He claimed that as a third-generation immigrant, he couldn’t speak Spanish that well. Afterwards, they continued to exchange various gossip about the school teachers.

While the two were talking, Carol arrived with food and placed plates in front of them. It was cheeseburgers served on thick white ceramic plates, along with Cherry Coke in glass cups. Carol told them to enjoy their meal. She said goodbye and disappeared.

Even without Carol saying anything, the cheeseburgers looked delicious enough. Luca and Noah took a bite of their burgers at the same time.

The buns, toasted to a golden brown, were crispy on the outside and soft on the inside, while the juicy patties and the melted yellow cheese on top were savory. The lettuce and onions were crunchy and filled their mouths with freshness. Like teenagers their age, Luca and Noah devoured the burgers in the blink of an eye. Before they knew it, the plates were clean, and they were left crunching on the ice remaining in their cups.

As growing teenagers, they were not yet full. They exchanged glances and confirmed [Read on]that they could only feel satisfied after ordering large French fries and a milkshake each. It was the most heart-fulfilling dinner of Luca’s life.

***

“Luca, can you give me a ride? I left my car behind today.”

Noah suddenly made a request to Luca, who was playing with the straw in a milkshake cup.

“But isn’t that black Jeep the car you drove yesterday?”

Luca pointed at the black car visible outside the window.

“No.”

Noah firmly denied it. Yesterday, he had definitely driven home in a car that looked exactly like that one. However, Noah’s car wasn’t the only one in the world, and there were likely many identical cars. Luca nodded and asked Noah.

“Then which way is your house?”

Luca bent the straw as he spoke. It had already been folded in so many directions that it was gradually losing all function as a straw.

“Haddon Street.”

Noah gestured roughly toward Haddon Street as he spoke. It happened to be not far from Luca’s house. For some reason, he was so glad to hear this that he almost shouted, “I live nearby, too!” but managed to hold back.

“It’s close. Alright. I’ll give you a ride.”

“Thanks. Then I’ll treat you to dinner today.”

Noah reached over the table and snatched the bill.

“No, it’s fine. We’ll split the bill.”

Luca tried to snatch the bill from Noah’s hand, but it was no use.

“Don’t make me out to be a stingy guy who gets a ride but doesn’t buy a meal.”

It felt awkward to keep refusing when Noah was saying that. Instead, Luca made a humorous remark directed at Noah.

“Alright then. I’ll provide you with the finest driving service.”

“Then I’m counting on you. Driver Luca.”

Noah smiled and played along. While the two were bickering, Carol approached, and Noah took out his wallet and held out some cash. Carol didn’t even bother to count the money and just smiled at them.

“Well then, guys. Bye.”

‎

‎

“Get in first.”

Luca opened the passenger door for Noah. It was a thoughtful gesture, as he likely wasn’t used to the different car model.

As Noah climbed into the car through the door Luca had opened, he teased him.

“Wow, Luca. Did you escort me? You’re such a gentleman. I’m a little flustered.”

Actually, he was serious. Luca felt shy and embarrassed by the word “flustered,” so he shouted back, “What?” and got into the driver’s seat.

Noah glanced around the car while Luca started the engine. The interior was as neat as the owner. There was even a scent. It wasn’t sweet, but it was a refreshing and pleasant fragrance. Noah thought that scent was just like Luca.

Luca, who had already buckled his seatbelt, connected his phone to the car and looked at Noah.

“Can I play some music?”

“Of course!”

Noah didn’t refuse. So, Luca played the playlist he listened to most often while driving. And as the song started playing, Noah exclaimed, “Oh!” in delight.

“It’s Bellbottoms. Did you see the movie that used this as a theme song?”

Luca beamed at Noah’s reaction and replied in an excited voice.

“Of course. I watched it at the theater, and on the way home, I listened through the entire soundtrack album, and before I knew it, I was dancing on the street.”

Luca put on a playful expression and moved his body slightly to the music. At that, Noah burst into laughter.

“Haha. You, Luca?”

Luca looked a little sulky when Noah laughed a little too loudly.

“Why? I can dance too.”

“No, I can believe that. It’s just the part where you said you danced in the street.”

Noah looked at his expression and spoke in a soothing tone. Luca replied playfully with a slightly shameless look.

“It was nighttime, so no one probably saw me.”

As the music grew more intense, Noah tapped his feet to the beat. Both Noah and Luca were getting more and more excited.

“Listening to this makes me feel like we should go rob a bank.”

Luca said as he started the car. Then, with a comical expression that Noah had never seen before, he asked,

“Shall we go to the bank?”

Noah wasn’t exactly fond of crime, but he felt like going to the bank with Luca. It seemed like robbing a bank while wearing a long, ugly mask would be fun with Luca.

Luca and Noah, like Bonnie and Clyde.

“Okay. Let’s go.”

“What? Really?”

It was Luca who was actually flustered by Noah’s overly enthusiastic acceptance. But Noah quickly calmed him down.

“Of course I’m not serious.”

There was a significant amount of sincerity mixed in, but Luca didn’t need to know. Not yet. At Noah’s reply, Luca wore a deflated expression.

During the short drive, they exchanged lyrics to the music playing in the background. They sang and danced, as if the car were a small karaoke room. It was the kind of scene where anyone watching might have reported them for drunk driving.

Luca parked the car where Noah gestured. Noah’s house was big and a three-story home with a well-maintained garden. It was enough to tell at a glance that the person managing the house had a great affection for it. Noah got out of the car, walked back to the driver’s seat, and tapped the window. As Luca rolled down the window, Noah, with his arm resting on the window frame, met Luca’s eyes and said goodbye.

“Bye.”

Luca looked into Noah’s eyes as well. Noah’s dark brown eyes were moist, affectionate. He did not take his gaze off Noah’s eyes and moved his lips slightly.

“Bye.”

At Luca’s greeting, Noah smiled brightly. As he walked back home, Noah looked back with a regretful expression.

Just as Luca was about to start the car after confirming that Noah was taking out his keys to open the door, Noah returned to him with long strides. His handsome face drew closer to Luca once again. In the meantime, Noah’s hair had become slightly disheveled.

“What’s wrong?”

When Luca asked, Noah held out his cell phone. Luca took the phone and looked at him, wondering what he meant. Then, Noah said in a determined voice.

“I don’t have your contact information. Can you give me your number?”

Only then did Luca realize that they didn’t have each other’s contact information. He carefully dialed his number for fear of giving the wrong one, and handed the phone to Noah.

Noah took the phone back, waved, and went inside. Luca realized he hadn’t received Noah’s number, but he had already gone inside. Luca felt strangely anxious, but he had no choice but to start the car again.

Their houses weren’t far apart, so Luca arrived home quickly. After parking, he rummaged through his bag for his house keys. His phone vibrated. He quickly checked it and found a text message.

[Hey, It’s me!]

It was a message from an unsaved number without a name, but Luca knew who the sender was. It was Noah. Luca found himself smiling and saved Noah’s number. Then he sent a reply.

[Hey, ‘Me!’]

He inserted the key into the door, and the keychain attached unauthorized copyto the house key jingled. It was a pleasant sound.

***

Luca and Noah met at Grey’s every day for nearly a month after their vacation started. Luca always felt his heart flutter while meeting Noah. And about fifteen days into meeting Noah, he realized that it was love.

Love was something unfamiliar to Luca.

If Cookie, the brown poodle who lived next door when he was young, was his first love, then so be it; meeting Cookie was always just enjoyable and pleasant, not the unbearable palpitations he felt when meeting Noah. However, it was always like that when he met Noah. It wasn’t that he felt bad. Luca was always happy when he was with Noah.

The two didn’t do anything particularly special when they met. First, they talked while eating at Grey’s, talked about songs while driving together, and on nice days, they sat on the hood, admiring the scenery while talking. They didn’t exactly hold hands or make physical contact. But Luca was so happy.

He felt guilty about those feelings. His parents would certainly disapprove of such emotions, especially for a boy. Luca’s parents were devout Christians. According to their faith, Luca deserved to go to hell.

However, he loved being with Noah. He was happy. He thought that even hell wouldn’t be so bad if he were with Noah. But the problem was whether Noah would go with him. He wasn’t sure if Noah liked him. During the week he spent agonizing over this issue, he felt that hell was not far away.

The results he obtained from testing Noah during that week were satisfying. Noah liked him too! He made absolutely no attempt to hide the fact that he liked Luca, to the point where Luca felt foolish for not noticing it sooner. Only then did he realize that Noah had been relentlessly flirting with him.

Noah also blushed in front of Luca, wanted to please him at all costs, and was worried that their conversation might be cut off. Noah mimicked the exact same behaviors Luca exhibited whenever they met.

The day Luca realized their feelings were mutual, he was so overjoyed that he kicked the bed repeatedly, causing it to sink slightly, but that didn’t matter.

Noah had also realized that Luca liked him, and both were convinced that they liked each other. That was why they didn’t bother to say words like “I like you” or “Let’s date.” And that was Noah’s mistake.

A week after Luca realized that their feelings were mutual, he had to go to Korea for a relative’s wedding. His trip, originally planned for three days, unexpectedly extended to two weeks. During that time, Luca deleted Noah’s contact information and changed both his phone number and social media accounts. And after meeting and parting ways as freshmen, the two didn’t even cross paths, let alone speak to each other, until they became seniors.